bone i dont know why i put that up there under your post. like you dont have enough to deal with. buddy im so sorry that i did that but before i really thought about it i did it. then later i got to thinking and it was to late.i again im so sorry please dont let this crap get you down. im not going to do it now, but i wont lie to you i did come close a few times since my wreck.but i couldnt do that to my little bride.she has lost so many in her life. i have lost a cousin and a few close friends to suicide,ive seen the aftermath and it is not good.i have never run from anything in my life im not gonna start now.i was trying to say that that is how desparete ive be come because of having to deal with the pain, my losing my ability to think clearly and all the other goodies that come with brain damage.then worry about how to deal with my son. he has seen the aftermath of dope, thats why its such a shock to me that he went that way.im going to set him down tonite and tell him freeride is over. we will see how that goes over. lol hes not using right now but i know its always close by. ive lived that life. there isnt anything he can tell me or hide from me, if i just open my damn eyes.dont worry about me brother,take care of you and yours. im a fighter, hell i love to fight, so i quess this is just one more thing to fight.lol i truly didnt mean to make it sound like thats whats in my mind now, it was something in the past. take care my friend. im always thinking of all of you guys here on rj when things are bad for yall.man scoooter even got me to praying. and i never even talked to him. i have never heard his voice.lol but he sure can write!! take care